The Best Goodbyes

[Soundtrack to Post: Bon Iver]

Eight days and counting...


So, I have found it really hard to publish a post in the past month due to the extreme amount of events and emotions that have taken place. I have so many thank yous and declarations of love due to the people in my life that I have written at least two posts and deleted them a few days later because they just didn't do my feelings justice. Well, here is a less-than-adequate post about the absolutely awe-inspiring, heart-bursting emotion I am feeling as I drive away from the glorious Austin, TX.

Recently, I have received the warmest wishes and most Spirit-led prayers over my new journey to Thailand, and I haven't even left yet. A huge thank you to my community here in Austin for truly sending me to Thailand in the best possible way, with reminders of God's vision in my heart and prayers that His glory is magnified wherever I end up.

Thursday of last week was the last time I had fellowship with my church group here in Austin. Oh, what a lovely time it was! Tears abounded and laughing ensued directly after the tears. Prayers were sent up from people I have known over a year that have shared so much joy and grief with me and also from people that knew me two weeks, both believing in God's plan for my life. The God of Jacob and the God of Summer and the God of Thailand is a unifying King. He sits enthroned in Heaven, loving and saving, speaking and silencing.

A moment near the end of Thursday night held me speechless (a rarity, I know). A girl who had only been in my presence/knew I existed for two weeks, sought me out and wanted to prophesy over my next chapter of life in Thailand. What a prophecy it was! While she was talked and reading Psalm 29 over me, I felt the peace of God consume my head and my heart. She spoke of the voice of the LORD, and how I will hear it more clearly than ever before and how I will be led to provide peace and strength to those around me. What a high vision! In the midst of this utter peace, my stomach was lurching out of excitement and anticipation. I wanted to run out the door and jump on a plane, then a bus, and hug everyone in The Juniper Tree and tell them "Y'all are awesome and doing magnificent things! Don't give up hope that our God reigns and He is drawing many to himself through your faithful work!" And, in a short time, I will get to do so...well, I might wait a few weeks for the hugs. Ha! Who am I kidding? No, I won't.

This past month has been filled with The Best Goodbyes. Celebrations and care and questions filled with delight and desire have been thrown my way. While I take only a few moments today to ponder them and think of the future, I can honestly say I am SUPER excited. I was telling a good friend last night, the thing I am most looking forward to is the moment in traveling to a new place, when you board the plane and are taking off, utterly suspending from all communication to the outside world, unknown personally to anyone on the flight, and you have nothing to lean on except God and His promises to you. This moment for me usually lasts from walking through airport security to awakening the first morning in a new place. It is terror and excitement. Glee and fright. Hunger and sustenance. And I have been looking forward to it for about 802 days now.

In knowing that this post should be a novel to do my graditude and delight justice, I leave you with a sincere Thank You and a word from my God:

"Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, ² then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. ³ Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, ⁴ not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others." Phil. 2:1-4

May this be true in my upcoming week and and weeks to come.